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Musical Definitions

Courtesy of Adrian Drover

  • DAL SEGNO - A place in the music where everyone stops playing while they look for the Sign.
  • RALLENTANDO - What happens when the pizz bass player gets a cramp.
  • MAJOR INTERVAL - One in which too much refreshment is consumed.
  • DIMINISHED INTERVAL - Time set by the conductor to avoid the effects of a Major Interval.
  • FIFTH - Amount needed by the lead trumpet player to see him through the gig.
  • FORTE-PIANO - Make your own choice of dynamic.
  • PENTATONIC SCALE - Used by composers who don't know how to voice a Dominant 7th chord.
  • HARP - Instrument that needs a calculator and Fred Astaire feet to play chromatically.
  • DODECAPHONIST - Person who has finally discovered the limitations of being a pop guitarist.
  • OPERA - Music which would undoubtedly sound much nicer without the singers.
  • ORGAN SWELL- (see biology).
  • ALTO CLEF - Antique symbol retained by composers for the soul use of violas, in the hope that no one would take the trouble to learn it.
  • EQUAL TEMPERAMENT - Orchestra in which the string and brass players are compatible... metaphorically speaking.
  • SEMITONE - Wrong mouthpiece.
  • MICROTONE - Wrong instrument.
  • OVERTONE - Sound produced by a player who believes he/she is the only one right.
  • MICROPHONE - Single reed brass instrument invented by Adolphe Sax that was accidentally swallowed on its first test run. Ask Tom Izzo for more details.
  • MEGAPHONE - Member of the same brass-reed family as the Microphone, which toppled over during its first solo performance and killed the entire string section.