Courtesy of Adrian Drover
- DAL SEGNO - A place in the music where everyone stops playing while they
look for the Sign.
- RALLENTANDO - What happens when the pizz bass player gets a cramp.
- MAJOR INTERVAL - One in which too much refreshment is consumed.
- DIMINISHED INTERVAL - Time set by the conductor to avoid the effects of a
- FIFTH - Amount needed by the lead trumpet player to see him through the gig.
- FORTE-PIANO - Make your own choice of dynamic.
- PENTATONIC SCALE - Used by composers who don't know how to voice a Dominant
- HARP - Instrument that needs a calculator and Fred Astaire feet to play
- DODECAPHONIST - Person who has finally discovered the limitations of being a
- OPERA - Music which would undoubtedly sound much nicer without the singers.
- ORGAN SWELL- (see biology).
- ALTO CLEF - Antique symbol retained by composers for the soul use of violas,
in the hope that no one would take the trouble to learn it.
- EQUAL TEMPERAMENT - Orchestra in which the string and brass players are
compatible... metaphorically speaking.
- SEMITONE - Wrong mouthpiece.
- MICROTONE - Wrong instrument.
- OVERTONE - Sound produced by a player who believes he/she is the only one
- MICROPHONE - Single reed brass instrument invented by Adolphe Sax that was
accidentally swallowed on its first test run. Ask Tom Izzo for more details.
- MEGAPHONE - Member of the same brass-reed family as the Microphone, which
toppled over during its first solo performance and killed the entire string